Double Beet Salad with Goat Cheese & a dildo

4 May

If the day starts with the following questions all happening at the same time as everyone converges in your kitchen and it is before 7am:

Contractor: You know your roof has four leaks in it, right?

9-year-old: Mom?

6-year-old: What do I do if my vagina is itchy?

9 –year-old: Mom? Mom?

4-year-old: How come you never let me stir the boiling water for the pasta?

9-year-old:  Mom? Mom?  Mom? You want to hear me play American Idiot on the electric guitar?

11-year-old: What’s a dildo?

Then this is what you can answer:

How much will it cost to fix the roof and can you just patch it? Go use a clean, cold washcloth, wipe yourself and don’t wear leggings today – vaginas need to breathe.  I don’t let you stir boiling water because I don’t want you to get burned, but you can stir the shredded beets, okay?  Yes, I do want to hear you play Green Day but you have to stop asking me fifteen times in a row.

Then a) ask where the 11-year-old hear that word and b) explain that it’s a fake penis and talk about why Eminem chooses certain themes in his music c) praise the 11-year-old for asking and d) treat yourself to some really really good goat cheese and make some colorful beet salad to enjoy later, when everyone is asleep, the contractor has gone home, the roof is – temporarily – fixed, and there are no question marks except your own.  May I have seconds?

Yes.

Tri-colored Beet Salad

This looks beautiful and has a blend of sweet and salty that would be great served with fish or with cubes of sautéed tofu.  You might also add in brown rice or quinoa for a hearty side dish or main meal. Or just eat as is with a bed of summer greens or shaved raddichio.

2 golden beets

2 red beets

Three big carrots

Goat cheese (I used Spanish Capricho de cabra)

Olive oil

Sea salt

Sprig of fresh rosemary

Lemon or lime juice (optional)

Peel the carrots and slice on the diagonal, about ¼ inch thick, so you get a wide surface.  Toss with olive oil and sea salt (not too drippy, just a drizzle) and arrange in single layer on a sheet, sprinkle rosemary on top. Bake at 375 for 20-30 minutes undisturbed.  Meanwhile, peel beets.  Slice red beets into matchsticks and yellow beets into thin rounds (about 1/8 inch thick).  Sautee the yellow beets first in pan with a bit more oil and salt until just cooked – about 10-15 minutes – and starting to brown at the edges.  Then remove the yellow beets from the pan and sautee the red matchsticks for about 10-15 minutes until just tender.  Take carrots form oven and beets from pan and arrange on a plate with crumbles of goat cheese on top.  Serve warm or cold with a squeeze of lemon or lime juice on top right before serving if you like.

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